Deep in the heart of Texas (clap clap clap clap)
Thoughts on never leaving home, where I dream of living, art forms from Italy to India and the perfect end-of-summer movie
WHAT DOES IT MEAN THAT I NEVER LEFT HOME?
Blame it all on my roots
If you are from Texas, really from Texas, you know the importance of those four claps at the words “deep in the heart of Texas.” It’s an instinct, an irresistible response. It’s the natural thing to do. It’s part of the identity.
I have only ever lived in Texas. I never thought that would be the case. I don’t think I look like I’m from Texas and I don’t always feel like I fit here. I’m a city girl. I don’t own cowgirl boots. I went to the rodeo for the first time last year and it was because a friend who moved from out of state invited me. It’s only when I’m very tired that my Texas accent emerges. I say “a” like “ay” and catch myself, trying to correct it.
When I was younger, I dreamed about living around the world. I wanted to go to college in New York City, study abroad in France and get a job in London. I liked the idea of living in Africa or spending some time in India. One summer during college, I tried to go to Belgium for three months to work at a refugee camp.
But in Texas, I stayed.
Lately, I’ve wondered: Why here? What compelled me to stay? I’ve browsed for homes in Connecticut, New York City, Charleston and Savannah, wondering what life would be like somewhere else. But I don't know if I’d ever really move. It seems outrageously unlikely.
When you start to build a life and you settle into it, you do lots of math. You look around and add up the sum of your life’s parts to see what it says about you and whether what it says aligns with how you see yourself. Like I mentioned before, I’ve never felt like much of a Texan. And, at times, it perplexes me that I’m still here. What gets to me the most is the feeling that Texas, Dallas particularly, isn’t interesting enough. The city isn’t old enough. There aren’t any interesting things to do. This is no Florence, Paris or New York City. Has anyone ever read a book about a woman who packs up to move to Dallas for a life of adventure?
But there’s a bit of denial in that, in the take that my hometown is boring. It’s like how, when you live with your parents and siblings, you don’t notice all of the weird habits until you move out and see yourself in other circumstances. Or how an accent doesn’t stick out until you’re somewhere else.
Things start to blend together if you stare at them for too long.
I think many in my generation grew up with this idea that a beautiful, meaningful life with a story worth telling meant doing something outrageous, daring, or moving away from home. I think of all the girls who grew up wanting to be like Belle (“I want adventure in the great wide somewhere.”) or Rory Gilmore, or some other young woman who leaves a typical life behind for something more interesting. Staying in your hometown doesn’t make for an interesting story.
But I don’t want to leave Texas, not really. I don’t know that I ever will. I like knowing how to navigate anywhere in the city, how to cut around traffic or take a scenic route home and drive by multi-million-dollar houses. And, my gosh, I love barbecue.
I think my point in all of this is that, as I am doing all the math and counting up on my fingers the sum of my life, I’m realizing that life is really what you make of it. There is no one, single, irrefutable definition of adventure, nor is there one definition of success or of meaning. Every little choice you make adds up to the life you have. You can never play out or predict how those choices will shape your life. That’s what makes it—your life, my life, any life—an adventure in its own right.
HOME AWAY FROM HOME
If I lived somewhere else, these are the homes I’d choose
Houses look so different depending on their location. It’s obvious, I know, to say that, but it’s not just to do with materials or the era during which the home was built. British homes are more likely to be eclectic, packed with collected items and cozied up with furniture—a little bit untidy. That’s less likely here, in the U.S., where we tend to prefer tidy, everything-in-its-place, coordinated homes.
In all of my dreams about living in new, interesting places, I always think about the types of homes I’d have. Here are a few places I’d love to live and the details of home design that stick out to me.
Venice, Italy
When we were in Italy over New Year’s, we took a day trip to Venice. It was magical. I left thinking that, if I could ever have a home in Italy, I think I’d choose an apartment in Venice. What I love most about the homes in Venice is that they are old and adorned with plenty of centuries-old details (such is the case in most of Italy, though). For example, Skye McAlpine’s home in Venice is a stucco- and fresco-covered dream. And, below, here’s a bedroom in the Venice home of art restorer Toto Bergamo Rossi. I love the layers and the coziness of the furniture arrangement. Most of all, of course, I love the ceiling.
Tangier, Morocco
Interior designer Gavin Houghton’s home in Morocco is full of saturated color and plenty of stripes, see below. (More pictures here.) Where I live, it’s rare to see a truly saturated space that also has an ease to it. This one below doesn’t look overly styled or stuffy. It’s like someone decided to take out a step stool and paint stripes on the ceiling one afternoon. Nothing too serious about it! Bright, saturated colors seem to be a theme in Morocco: another beautiful home and one more.
New Orleans, Louisiana, USA
I’d move to New Orleans for the porches (and the beignets and po’boys, to be fair). In the Garden District, there are these beautiful historic homes where I picture myself sitting on the porch each morning. I wouldn’t mind the humidity. The photographer who took the photo below, Valerie Esparza, captures New Orleans in a dream-like way. I especially love to see the photos she takes around Christmas and Mardi Gras when the houses are all dolled up for celebrations.
England, UK
After years of reading Jane Austen and the Brontë sisters, dreaming of life in the English countryside was an inevitable outcome. Granted, most of my dreams of a life in the UK mean living in castles, like Belvoir Castle below. This one is particularly special. Many historic movies were filmed there and it’s full of hand-painted wallpaper that has been restored by experts in the craft. I wouldn’t mind it one bit. However, on a podcast, the owner talked about the home’s ghosts. I might mind that.
YOU CAN TAKE IT WITH YOU
Design, decor and art from around the world
If you walk down the streets of Florence, you’ll see paper store after paper store. And, along the Italian coast, you’ll find countless stores selling beautiful pottery. In Venice, there are brightly lit stores full of Murano glassware. It’s like finding a bagel shop in New York or a po’boy in New Orleans: this form of artistry is part of the region’s identity.
I have loved to learn about the different types of decorative art from around the world and long sought to build my own collections. Here are a few items of interest, to collect on trips or while browsing online from your couch.
I love the colors of this glass pitcher from Murano in Italy.
Block print textiles from India have the most beautiful patterns and color combinations. If you know how to sew, you can buy inexpensive fabric on Etsy to use for your own projects. If you’re not so inclined, see Simrane in Paris and Les Indiennes in New York.
How pretty are these ceramic Talavera tiles from Mexico? I’d love to pick one of the blue and white patterns and use it as a backsplash in the kitchen.
These wall-mounted hand soaps from France make me laugh. How clever!
Welsh blankets make me think of fall. I’ve been on the hunt for one for a while, to add layers to my bed or to stack up in a pile in the living room. These retailers (one and two) in the UK are said to be the best, but you may be able to find some blankets on Etsy too.
GOOD CHOICE: DAVID LEAN’S “SUMMERTIME”
A romantic movie about summer in Venice
As summer comes to a close, I feel a sort of melancholy, lingering feeling that I think many others experience too. It’s a happy and sad time of year and I have a movie recommendation to match the mood perfectly. I watched the 1955 film “Summertime” with Katharine Hepburn a few weeks ago. It’s about a school teacher who takes a trip to Venice. It was one of the best movies I’ve seen in a long time and captured that sweet, beautiful, melancholy end-of-summer feeling.
NEXT WEEK
Can you live in a small home for the long run?
How much space is enough space? Let’s talk about small homes, whether more is really more and how to make the most of where you live.
All the best,
Mary Grace